This is me?

Not just a Mamma, my name is Chelle.

I love reading and have not done enough of that recently, as in proper book reading. I love music, my husband plays guitar and although I have one I am scared that I’ll never be able to play a chord. I have a lovely daughter who yesterday walked with a walker. I was so proud.

I am also Chelle and I’ve probably neglected her for a while. I got signed off work yesterday. I am sad inside and I really don’t have any concept of why. I don’t want to be pigeon holed into that certain depression assigned to mummies. I don’t think I am that kind of unhappy.

Home life is lovely, we have money coming in again and we’ve been able to afford to do things together. Work is alright, it’s as most people find going to work. I have a manager that is lovely, that is really supportive. So why am I feeling unhappy.

I am missing out. On things Mini Mc is achieving, ideas I’d like to blossom, being a wife.

I get stressed out easily, I panic that things are, well that life is a bit much. I start at 6am and sit down to relax at 8/9pm. I know I signed up for this life when having a baby. I was a PA before maternity leave but now I have no concept of time management.

This is a not a moan and yes I am feeling a little bit/a lot sorry for myself. Returning to work has meant another change of lifestyle for me and along the way I became a mamma and misplaced the Chelle.

So where am I this morning? Well having just spoken to my manager I’m going to look at what I can do next, to make things easier for myself. Give Chelle a break out moment and grab a cuppa and a book and sit in bed reading.

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